• Ezzie

Beginning to understand who I inherited my stubbornness from...

Oh today. You began at five, you were tedious by ten and it's only eight now but it feels later and I think you have outworn your welcome.

I've been at home. All day. Well, I had a walk. But if felt strange that I couldn't jump in the car and trawl round the supermarket if I wanted. For all I'd catch very little and certainly no loo roll. I love the way English adapts and expands to meet every situation. All the songs rewritten to include Corona, and 'spreader' is now an insult - not that it was ever a compliment perhaps. And by the time we're done, there will be a whole raft of words no one had dreamt off last November. Covid-19. Corona virus. The first a new word and the second has been around for ever. But it has acquired new meaning. The latin root is crown. But the word corona itself can be; the middle of a daffodil; a chandelier in a church; a broad, vertical face on a cornice in a building; and now, the destroyer of lives and incomes and maybe more. Some coronation for humankind hey...

My first chore today was a remote log on to school and then finalising lessons, issuing tasks, reading emails, checking software works and generally organising myself. That went fine. Nothing crashed or burned, so that's a result.

The next chore was ringing my father and attempting to convince him to self-isolate. I had a moment of triumph when he agreed. Which disappeared abruptly when he made clear later on, that for him, that includes a daily trip to get a paper. Because it's not dangerous. He doesn't touch anything, not even a door; he puts a token on a counter, picks up a paper and leaves through the open door. I'm not convinced. So the doors open; how hard is this guy breathing? Coughing? I realise that karma is having quite a belly laugh at me as I recall all the times he attempted to get me to follow a rule I wouldn't recognise as having any existence let alone relevance. But he had authority over me then. Now, I'm just a grown up daughter trying to get my dad to do something that could save his life, or some one else's. And I'm self-isolating so I can visit him. The thought popped into my mind - what if he gives it to me on my visit? What if I have a condition I don't know about which is exacerbated? Who knows. I've reached a point with it now where I realise I have to let go. He'll go buy his paper. He's entitled to take his own chances for himself and I just wish it was only his chances that were being bet on here. But enough. I'll do what I can do.

I'm desperately tired and I have no reason to be and no excuse. A lazy day. A little walk. A little work. A lot of nagging and endlessly chasing a delivery slot.

Bang. Boom! There it is again. The sentence about the delivery would have been odd a fortnight ago. Today it communicates so much more. There goes our language mutating faster than a virus. We hope. What'll the next generation say to the kids from this one? Will they get to have a snarky nickname?

So, I guess today's pictures attempt to introduce a little smile into what has been a slightly grim day. There was sunshine; it was glorious. I had a lovely walk and every day I walk the spring has dug itself a little more firmly in. I love the way the little shoots come out in rushes and the endless varieties of green that appear everywhere. I even love sloshing the mud in my welly boots, as carelessly as a child. But as I'm in charge of the carpet, I spend a very un-childlike five minutes sloshing in the stream and wiping them on grass, so they don't need extensive rinsing when I get home.

Tomorrow is Wednesday, which is my Friday. I don't feel like I've earned it this week. But I'll have earned it after driving for three hours round just to stand in a garden and deliver groceries and have a chilly cuppa through a window with dad on Thursday.

But first - here's how Delilah was helping me work today. Should have called her Polly.

And now my walk. Little flowers and tangled branches were among the things that caught my eye today. One fallen tree which appeared dead from a distance but which had tiny buds beginning to show in one part. I'll take that as an omen, thank you. And there was my favourite stand of trees too. I don't know why I like them so much, but I have a favourite hill too, so maybe I'm a little odd. Maybe!

And these are the trees. Couldn't tell you what's so lovely about them but there's something...

I think this is a type of nettle. Anyone want to tell me? But it's pretty.

And this is the tree that looks dead but isn't done yet. It's got a good crop of ivy on it too.

3 views0 comments